So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
