Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
