Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
