I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
