I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
