didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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