i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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