oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Randomize
