no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
