Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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