If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
