i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
