this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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