Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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