Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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