Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize