East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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