break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
