Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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