Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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