why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
