she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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