is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
