Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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