Pappa wants mamma naked
If that was your dad, he is hot
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
