How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
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