you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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