Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
