i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
how drunk are you?
Several
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
