We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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