Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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