Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
