I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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