Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
