You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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