Small penises have feelings too.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
