That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
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