How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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