You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Randomize
