Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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