Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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