That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
