O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
It's just like the Real World with babies
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
