TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
