We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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