If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
