Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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