his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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