apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Randomize