I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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