he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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